A Wonderful Caregiving Roadshow

I want to thank Barb Stahley and The Boston Shoppes of Boston, Pennsylvania, for hosting our first “Taking Care of Our Caregivers” seminar on Saturday. It was a pleasure for me to meet local family caregivers and a privilege to hear their personal experiences and insights. The seminar was the perfect way to end November, National Family Caregiver’s Month.

During and after my presentation, I had the wonderful opportunity to address insightful questions from several of the family caregivers in attendance. Because so many of us share the same challenges and concerns, I thought I would share some highlights of our conversation:

• What can you do when a caregiver is not providing adequately for an elderly family member -- for example, when cheese and crackers are the daily meal? You might consider giving them the gift of Meals on Wheels for a one-month trial, to decrease the workload and financial burdens on the caregiver. Or, bring one-dish meals to their home that would be easy to freeze and serve. Finally, consider approaching the caregiver (with great sensitivity) to explore what might be happening and to learn about additional assistance they may need.

• Is there some resource that would provide in-home assistance to allow the caregiver some free time? Many options exist, including professional home-care, hospice, and community resources such as Area on Aging. Sometimes, simply telling friends, neighbors, church members or health care professionals that you need a break can make a tremendous difference. People want to help, but they may not know what you need. (Proving this point, the caregiver who raised this question at the seminar said she was so fatigued and just wanted help with housekeeping; another caregiver in attendance offered her a recommendation and contact information on the spot!)

• What should you do when you think your loved one may be experiencing symptoms of dementia? The best course of action is to discuss the changes you are observing with your loved one’s primary care physician, who can do some initial screening. There may be non-dementia causes that the physician can identify and treat.

We also discussed some of the topics I’ve featured in the Critical Conversations articles on this blog: when is it okay to say “no” to doctors’ suggestions for additional tests, procedures, and medications? (we discussed such things as communicating honestly with each other and advance directives); and the difference between home care, hospice care, and palliative care.

“The Caregiver’s Caregiver” seminars are great opportunities to connect with other caregivers and build a stronger caregiving community. The seminars are all about compassion and taking care of one and other. Stay tuned for more information on upcoming “road shows” and if you would like to schedule a seminar at no cost for your civic, church, social, or neighborhood group, just drop me a note at caregiver2caregiver@gmail.com.


I thank all who came to this event and made it possible. You made my Thanksgiving incredibly special.